


All That Could Have Been

by lonelydaisies



Category: Wolverine (Movies), X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: F/M, Mentions of blood & injuries, Old Man Logan - Freeform, Romance, smut in later chapters, why do i love angry old men so much
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-30
Updated: 2017-05-30
Packaged: 2018-11-06 18:43:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11042046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lonelydaisies/pseuds/lonelydaisies
Summary: Logan is growing weak, his time left dwindling down with each passing day. Your last weeks with him are chaotic and exhausting, but the growing need to make your feelings towards him known finally has you breaking.





	All That Could Have Been

**Author's Note:**

> UM? I'm back with more really really terrible summaries I am so sorry and shoutout to you if you clicked on this regardless of what is terribly written up top.

The convenient store you're currently aimlessly walking around in is empty enough for you to let your guard down, if only for a second. The chaos which has been almost nonstop for the past forty-eight hours has you standing on tired legs, a few bad bruises painting your skin black and blue here and there. There's a pretty bad cut on your cheek from the blade of some dressed-all-in-black asshole, and it burns and itches with every movement of your mouth. You make a note to look for something to help with the pain, though a convenient store probably isn't the best place for that.

Glancing over your shoulder, you see that Laura has gone off to follow Charles around, listening as he falls into a comforting, one sided conversation with the little girl. You can't stop the sadness in your heart as you watch her, a small speckle of blood soaked into her shirt. Laura hasn't said a word since the day you met her, but you can tell that this is all quickly taking it's toll on her. Yes, she's strong and capable, perfectly able to fight and protect herself, but you can see the envy in her dark eyes every time she spots someone her age, lovingly holding hands with their mother or father. It breaks your heart, and while you work on getting her to safety, you pray to whatever is listening to that she'll soon live as normal of a life as possible.

Turning your attention back to the task at hand, you know you should be gathering up a few water bottles, maybe some snacks to take along with you on the long ride to North Dakota, but your mind is much too preoccupied with something, or rather, someone else.

Logan had immediately limped off to the small men's bathroom the second he parked the car and hopped out. It's been several minutes and you haven't seen him since, and the worry stirring in your chest has you anxiously chewing on your bottom lip, wondering if he's okay in there by himself.

Going against your better judgement, you turn on your heal away from the rows of junk food to make your way over to the corner of the store towards the restrooms, bottom lip still in a tight hold between your teeth as you slowly bring a hand up, knocking on the door with a loose fist.

There's a familiar grunt that comes from the other side, but it isn't enough to reassure you that everything is okay (because, really, when is it ever?). Staring down at the tips of your muddy boots, you clear your throat before you speak.

"Are you alright?"

You inwardly curse yourself at the ridiculous question, rolling your eyes when you unsurprisingly don't get a response.

"Logan-"

"I'm fine." his voice is rough, barely audible from where you're standing.

He's not fine. You know this because you know _him;_ you know how he is, how he denies help even when he needs it the most. And you know what's happening, you've heard the whispers between Logan and Charles, you've seen the droplets of blood that soak through the fabric of his pure white button down when he's only doing something as simple as driving.

You know that things are going so, so terribly wrong - and you're fully aware that something disastrous is happening to the man you've grown so close to, you've just been too big of a coward to confirm it for yourself.

Much to your surprise, when you cautiously reach for the doorknob, it isn't locked. The twinge of guilt that hits you for walking in on Logan without permission quickly dies down when you see the state that he's in - hunched over the bathroom sink, his grip on the rim deathly tight but not tight enough to crack it, and you wonder if he's even strong enough anymore for that to happen.

The muscles in his back ripple and flex with every shaky breath he takes, and you choke back the noise that tries to tear it's way past your throat when you catch a glimpse of his sliced up, bloody torso in the dirty, cracked up mirror.

You move a little too quickly to be by his side, a gentle hand brushing against the taught muscles of his arm to get his attention- and it sparks something inside of you, deep down in your stomach that you haven't felt in a while. His skin is tanned and slightly sticky from sweat. He's dirty, but, hell, so are you. You can't remember the last time you were this close to him, to feel the warmth of his body against your own. A rush of memories flood your mind, to years ago when things were better, back to when happiness was an actual possibility in your lives. You miss the late nights spent with him, in bed with a bottle of beer, back to when if felt like you had all the time in world to be together.

You're quickly falling into a trance of your thoughts before a stern voice pulls you straight out of them.

"Can't a man get any damn privacy?"

Removing your hand from his arm, you take a step back. Logan gazes at you from the corner of his eye, expression completely unreadable though he's made you fully aware that he's not happy about the little intrusion.

Grabbing a few paper towels from the dispenser on the wall, you ball them up and run them under the warm water of the faucet,

"Let me help."

Logan straightens his posture, now standing at his full height as he studies you for a moment, but he doesn't back away when you inch closer to get a better look at the gashes on his abdomen. He winces once the paper towels make contact with his sensitive flesh, they're so cheap that even water can't cancel out the roughness of the paper and you apologize softly under your breath. He once again grips the sink with a trembling hand, and you can tell that he's trying his hardest to suppress his groans of discomfort, but you know he's in pain; he has been for a while now. These wounds are from days ago, and as you eye them down, there isn't a single hint that his body is doing the healing that it should be.

With the bleeding stopped and the blood cleaned up, you swallow thickly as you trash the now stained red paper towels, grabbing just one more to wipe up the excess water that's started dripping down his abs. After a lowly mumbled _"thanks",_ Logan begins to dress himself as you go to wash your hands, but he's slower than he should be, his eyebrows knit tightly together in pain as he lifts his arm to slip it into the sleeve of his button down.

You try to swallow down that painful lump in your throat, you've never seen him like this before. Wolverine is strong, he takes shit from no one and can take anything you throw at him - or at least _could_ , once upon a time.

The realization of how serious this is finally hits you like a fucking truck, and you swear your heart stops the moment the thought enters your mind-

"You're dying."

Logan's head snaps up, expression still unreadable as he does up the last few buttons of his shirt. His silence throughout these past couple of minutes finally becomes unbearable, all of the mixed emotions inside of you coming together like a crashing wave, only to bubble up in your chest and force you to choke out an almost silent sob.

The man in front of you heaves out a heavy sigh, hand coming up to scratch at the coarseness of his graying beard,

"Have been for a while now." he says, almost nonchalantly.

You break then, your bottom lip quivering and vision blurred with unshed tears that are sure to fall soon enough, and you feel like a child in front of him. Too vulnerable, too emotional, so fucking naive to have fallen for him without stopping to think about all of the things that could tear him away from you in an instant.

Logan is visibly growing agitated with your reaction, once again sighing and he can feel a headache creeping up on him, pounding at his temples and tightening in his forehead.

"Stop." his voice is low and the command is stern, but he can't look at you, can't bear to see the emotional state he's put you in.

You sniffle, covering your mouth with the back of your hand in a desperate attempt to hide your uneven breathing. One more blink of your eyes is all the more it takes to force out the tears that have been gathering at the pink ducts of your eyes, hot and slick down your flushed face, stinging the broken flesh of your cheek, eyes red and throat so tight you can barely breathe.

Logan lifts his gaze, eyes now burning a hole through you and his jaw clenches out of pure anger,

"Don't you fuckin' cry over me-" he moves closer, but you don't even realize until you feel the heat of his body because your eyes are screwed shut in attempt to calm yourself, "not now, not ever."

  
You're speechless, mind racing a million miles a second. Your heart is thumping hard against your chest, and you jump at the sound of Logan slamming the bathroom door shut behind him, leaving you alone with your quiet sobs and broken heart.

**Author's Note:**

> This really does not showcase how good my writing is (not 2 toot my own horn but sometimes i am Good) so I'm kinda iffy about posting this but the future chapters are planned out more so those will be much better
> 
> go ahead and hmu with some comments!! let me know what you think cause i feel like this is bad folks
> 
> also I will add more back story to chapter 2 rip im a bad writer lmao


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